joke of the day
the first one with the dead woman....DISFREAKINGUSTING...the others are pretty good....here's one i found on a website
A young girl is wandering through a park in the pouring rain, when she comes across 3 dogs. Being a bit of an animal lover, she approaches them, bends down and starts to stroke one of them: "Ah, you're lovely, aren't you," she says to the first dog. "What's your name then?" To her surprise, the dog actually answers her, "My name's Huey, and I've had a great day going in and out of puddles." she moves on to the next dog. "And what's your name then?" Again, unbelievably, the 2nd dog answers her, "My name's Lewy, and I've had a great day going in and out of puddles." And so she moves on to the last dog. "Let me guess," she says. "your name's Dewy, and you've had a great day going in and out of puddles." " No, My name's Puddles and i've had a fvcking bad day."
A young girl is wandering through a park in the pouring rain, when she comes across 3 dogs. Being a bit of an animal lover, she approaches them, bends down and starts to stroke one of them: "Ah, you're lovely, aren't you," she says to the first dog. "What's your name then?" To her surprise, the dog actually answers her, "My name's Huey, and I've had a great day going in and out of puddles." she moves on to the next dog. "And what's your name then?" Again, unbelievably, the 2nd dog answers her, "My name's Lewy, and I've had a great day going in and out of puddles." And so she moves on to the last dog. "Let me guess," she says. "your name's Dewy, and you've had a great day going in and out of puddles." " No, My name's Puddles and i've had a fvcking bad day."
seeing his shadow and having six more weeks of basketball is talking about the groundhog. in the states (at least) feb 2 is groundhog day, where this animal comes out of his hole. if he sees his shadow, he gets scared and that supposedly means 6 more weeks of winter. does that help?
What's Green... Slimy... and smells like pork?
Kermit's d!ck...
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A teenager was eager for work, and nobody was hiring. He had just turned 16 and really needed to make some money to fix up his Tiburon, so he got a job at the local Funeral Home. One day the manager came to him and asked him to take on the horrible task of dressing one of the corpses and preparing it for the visitation the following day.
The young boy remembered seeing the young girl on the news, she had died mysteriously and nobody knew what had happened.
As he had started dressing the body, he noticed something unusual. The young boy ran to the manager, yelling histerically, "Come quick, I've found something!"
The manager ran into the room where the dead body was kept and asked what the boy had found.
The young boy explained that he had come to the conclusion that the young lady must have gone swimming in the ocean the night she died and drown. The manager asked how he had come to that conclusion. The young boy told the manager that he had found a shrimp stuff between her legs, that could only be found in the ocean and nowhere else. The manager laughed in amusement and said, "No you stupid boy, that's a pussy!" The boy was angry at the laughter and lashed out at the old man...
"You stupid old man, you don't even know what a cat looks like! That's a shrimp stuck between her legs... it looks like shrimp, it smells like shrimp, and it even tastes like shrimp!"
Kermit's d!ck...
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A teenager was eager for work, and nobody was hiring. He had just turned 16 and really needed to make some money to fix up his Tiburon, so he got a job at the local Funeral Home. One day the manager came to him and asked him to take on the horrible task of dressing one of the corpses and preparing it for the visitation the following day.
The young boy remembered seeing the young girl on the news, she had died mysteriously and nobody knew what had happened.
As he had started dressing the body, he noticed something unusual. The young boy ran to the manager, yelling histerically, "Come quick, I've found something!"
The manager ran into the room where the dead body was kept and asked what the boy had found.
The young boy explained that he had come to the conclusion that the young lady must have gone swimming in the ocean the night she died and drown. The manager asked how he had come to that conclusion. The young boy told the manager that he had found a shrimp stuff between her legs, that could only be found in the ocean and nowhere else. The manager laughed in amusement and said, "No you stupid boy, that's a pussy!" The boy was angry at the laughter and lashed out at the old man...
"You stupid old man, you don't even know what a cat looks like! That's a shrimp stuck between her legs... it looks like shrimp, it smells like shrimp, and it even tastes like shrimp!"
QUOTE (cjme2002)
seeing his shadow and having six more weeks of basketball is talking about the groundhog. in the states (at least) feb 2 is groundhog day, where this animal comes out of his hole. if he sees his shadow, he gets scared and that supposedly means 6 more weeks of winter. does that help?
yah, thanks
we dont have any winters here and we dont hav the groundhog day.. lol.gif




