"You know you are rice when...."
11-19-2001, 03:32 PM
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"You know you are rice when...."
I found this on another board and thought I would share it with you.
1 . You find yourself using the excuse "yo, but you got twice as many cylindaz" after EVERY race.
2. You have a 4-door 'type-R'.
3. Your gumby pants make it hard to shift.
4. More than 10 of your mods involve shielding what's actually underneath.
5. You have stickers that most people don't get.
6. You have stickers for parts you don't have.
7. You refer to 50hp as the 'big shot'.
8. Your car has so much camber it can drive on its side.
9. When you drive by, WW2 veterans run for shelter.
10. Your exhaust tip diameter is 4 times the inner muffler diameter.
11. You have 'powered by' anything anywhere on the car.
12. Birds make nests on your spoiler because its taller than the trees.
13. You sell crack for the image, not the money.
14. You have 'N/T' polished on one side of the car and don't know what bracket racing is.
15. You will only race if the other guy removes four sparkplugs.
16. You can't race uphills.
17. You have 'All Motor' emblazoned on your rear hatch, right next to your 14.50 dial-in
18. You brag about having nitrous and have a 14.50 dial-in.
19. The exhaust system for your 1.8L is bigger than most pro-stock cars.
20. You've spent more money on stickers and stripes than you did on actual performance mods.
21. You go to a performance shop and go directly to the decal bin.
22. Your tach is bigger than your head.
23. You have a shiftlight and your car is an automatic.
24. You refuse to race because it's a 'show car'.
25. Your only mods are cut factory springs and a 5" exhaust tip.
26. At autocross events you don't compete because you have a drag-race setup, and at drag races you brag about kicking *** at the autocross.
27. You have more lights on the front of your car than the USS Voyager.
28. You brag about a turbo kit that never seems to get installed.
29. Two years ago, your mom used to drive you to school in what's now your 'race car'.
30. Your bright green $300 air filter is bigger than your engine.
1 . You find yourself using the excuse "yo, but you got twice as many cylindaz" after EVERY race.
2. You have a 4-door 'type-R'.
3. Your gumby pants make it hard to shift.
4. More than 10 of your mods involve shielding what's actually underneath.
5. You have stickers that most people don't get.
6. You have stickers for parts you don't have.
7. You refer to 50hp as the 'big shot'.
8. Your car has so much camber it can drive on its side.
9. When you drive by, WW2 veterans run for shelter.
10. Your exhaust tip diameter is 4 times the inner muffler diameter.
11. You have 'powered by' anything anywhere on the car.
12. Birds make nests on your spoiler because its taller than the trees.
13. You sell crack for the image, not the money.
14. You have 'N/T' polished on one side of the car and don't know what bracket racing is.
15. You will only race if the other guy removes four sparkplugs.
16. You can't race uphills.
17. You have 'All Motor' emblazoned on your rear hatch, right next to your 14.50 dial-in
18. You brag about having nitrous and have a 14.50 dial-in.
19. The exhaust system for your 1.8L is bigger than most pro-stock cars.
20. You've spent more money on stickers and stripes than you did on actual performance mods.
21. You go to a performance shop and go directly to the decal bin.
22. Your tach is bigger than your head.
23. You have a shiftlight and your car is an automatic.
24. You refuse to race because it's a 'show car'.
25. Your only mods are cut factory springs and a 5" exhaust tip.
26. At autocross events you don't compete because you have a drag-race setup, and at drag races you brag about kicking *** at the autocross.
27. You have more lights on the front of your car than the USS Voyager.
28. You brag about a turbo kit that never seems to get installed.
29. Two years ago, your mom used to drive you to school in what's now your 'race car'.
30. Your bright green $300 air filter is bigger than your engine.
11-21-2001, 05:52 AM
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I've read that before too, pretty good stuff. It really is funny to see the guy who is always bragging about his car, then say "Hey, your mom used to bring you to school in that right?" So funny.