Below is a post I just this minute made to a forum full of my pals from the U.K.. One of them, Pembo, has just literally this morning in the UK picked up a brand new GK after slamming his RD into a wall..
We had a brief back and forth thread and the below followed..

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All this talk of Tiburons made me cluck a drive.. DONT even ask why I wanted to go for a drive at 2:38 AM but when the urge comes.. lmao.gif

So I got into my Pyjama bottoms and threw on a Tshirt and decided to go out for a drive.. This is the thing when you own a Tiburon/Coupe.. Every now and again you just feel the urge to take it out on the road.. It's like having a racing car that you can use every day.

So I go out to the car and go for a drive down R55 (70mph) and into Glassboro (about 20 miles away, medium sized town..)

Stop off at work on the way back to roll a cig, don't go in cos I look like a right plum in these PJ bottoms (american flag yeha I know the wife got them for me ) lmao.gif

So coming back I decided to go down R47 instead of 55.. 47 is a slower road (40-50 limits) but has some wicked corners.. Im driving like a f***ing *bellend* making sure that I get the 6800 rpm 'boost' before changing gears (autobox has a tiptronic type mode).

So as 47 goes over 55 (they merge) I woomped the f*** out of the car.. Literally I was doing about 85 in a 40 with the engine growling like a f***ing maniac..
Come down the overpass and slow it to about 55 (Im still in a 40 limit) and I see the blue lights.. Aaaaahhhhh f*** there goes my 5th week 'free' paycheck and I start getting really nervous as I know I am absolutely and utterly *f***ed*.. There's no explaining it away and my mind was racing for excuses but I realised I was just f***ed no matter what.

Cop comes up along side me.. But as he walks up alongside the car I notice him mutter to himself "oooo, nice" and I didnt know if he was talking about the car in a complimentary way or being sarcastic as if to say "heh I have a right racer here.."

So he very politely asks me for ins, reggy (kinda like road id for the car) and my license.. I give him all 3 as Im totally legal.. (btw for you brits you HAVE to carry all of that in the car, if not there's a $100+ fine for missing each one and then court) So he pauses and says "Where have you been Andrew?" and I didnt want to say "well this mate of mine from the UK just got a Tiburon so I thought I would go out in my pyjamas and have the arsehole out of my car sir" so I said "Well, I left work 3 hours ago, came home, ate, got in the shower and realised I had forgotten to do my log.. So I popped back to work to do it"

He paused, laughed and said "popped back to work eh?" so I says (in my finest english of course) "Yessir, I didnt want to get yelled at in the morning"

So he says "OK Andrew, have a nice night....... Oh, and slow it down will you you were speeding over double the limit" and walked away

I thought he was joking so I sat there for a moment thinking "f***ing hell that cant have just happened.." but he flashed his lights at me to let me go first.

f***..ME I cant believe I got away with that lmao.gif

Edit : For the Americans..

Cluck = Feign.. if you're clucking something you want it bad.

Bellend = the tip of a penis.. aptly named because it's shaped like a bell.. We use this as the americans would use dick head or something like that, but it's basically when youre being an idiot.

Plum = total dork.

 

hah! thats awesome. lmao.gif