Democrat vs. Republican
06-08-2004, 09:30 PM
#1
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How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans, and Rednecks? Answer - Pose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obsceities, raises theknife, and charges.
You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
Democrat Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him. that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway,
and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
Redneck's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obsceities, raises theknife, and charges.
You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
Democrat Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him. that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway,
and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
Redneck's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?
06-09-2004, 07:36 AM
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QUOTE (TibOne)
canadians dont fight... we just call our american friend who is cocky and carries a shotgun... or we wait til after the fight to kick the guy while he is down, and call him a *****
ROFLMAO....
Joe, that avatar is pretty funny too. lol.gif
06-09-2004, 10:00 AM
#9
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Vehicle: 2001 Hyundai Tiburon, 2004 Kia Sorento, 2010 Kia Soul
...
I'm an independent.
LOL
I'd prolly scream "Naaaaawwwwwzzzzz!!!" and run like Vin Diesel.
I'm an independent.
LOL
I'd prolly scream "Naaaaawwwwwzzzzz!!!" and run like Vin Diesel.