So ok...alot of you know about the bad break up I had with Kaitlin earlier this year. It was a heard break up for me because I had the ring and I was planning on proposing to her in August. We were BEST friends even before we got together in the relationship. The past 4 years, I spent the holidays with her and her family. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and even when I spun at the clubs on New Years Eve...she was there hanging out with me in the DJ booth as well. We spent the holidays together as best friends and as gf/bf.

When you're used to being with someone and around a certain group of people for the holidays for year after year...you get used to it and it becomes part of your personal tradition. This year, I wont be with them. I'm with Jenn (the new girl) now, but things have been complicated with her and the relationship has been rocky due to some things. We're spending Thanksgiving with her family but who knows how much longer the relationship will continue.

Anyway, its strange, awkward, different, and sad actually that I wont be with the family (and yes...even the girl) who I have been with the last few years during this time of the year. Is it wrong to feel that way, especially when Jenn wants to give me the best holidays she can give? I keep thinking about the great times I had during the holidays with Kaitlin and her family. It sucks that everything happened the way it did between us, and now we barely speak to each other....let alone the fact that I probably wont ever see her family again around this time of the year.

I'm trying to look at things in a new light and see that I'm with someone new (even though I dont know how long the relationship will be) and she wants to make me happy this year...but it still saddens me that I wont be doing what Im normally used to. So what do I do, and how do I get over this feeling?

 

Give it a chance. See how it goes, if thanksgiving doesn't work out then go from there.
I'm also in a similar boat as you right now. Good luck lol.

 

Its part of the natural instinct to stay with the familiar or a routine. Her family (at least to my knowledge) did not do anything to harm you and its perfectly understandable to want to be around people who liked you for the holidays, esp when you make it a tradition. You are perfectly in the right to be upset and sad about not being around people you grown to care for during the holidays.

It will be hard to be happy during the holidays even with a new gf, because its just not the same. Unless you just take yourself on vacation someplace its going to be difficult during times like this for a while.

I hear southern CA or the gulf coast is nice around this time of the year. take a personal vacation.

 

Nope, it's normal to feel that way. Just make the best of it with your new life and see how it goes. Try something different this year. No better start than a new start to get you going again.

 

yeah you've gotten too used to it. i know they were probably good people you knew and seen/talked to frequently but they still won't have any direct family links to you.

i know next to nothing about relationships. i have never been in one nor have i ever been attached to a girl but you have to getaway from the routine at times like these.

i also say try something different this time. i hate to point it out because this is my own problem, but try to stay away from the computer for a while. get something physical going on.

 

Are you estranged from your own family?

 

I dont talk to anyone in my family other than my sisters and a couple of cousins.

 

Unless there's a serious problem, maybe use this as an opportunity to get back in touch.

 

+1

 

I don't think it's weird to miss spending time with people you like or liked regardless of the circumstances.

Just go and try to have fun with Jenn and her family. Maybe it'll be really awesome.