HellBilly Rants The insane rantings of a crazed lunatic... if you are easily offended you may want to stay far, far away. Enter at your own risk.

Dear HellBilly....

Old Feb 22, 2012 | 12:00 PM
  #1  
HellBilly's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Your mom's house...
Vehicle: 2013 Genesis Coupe
Default Dear HellBilly....

So I am going to play with a new idea, a Dear HellBilly section. Send me your most outrageous, or serious questions and I HellBilly will answer them to the best of my ability and post them here for others to read. You can email me at hellbilly@hyundaiaftermarket.org and sign them anonymous if you feel the need.



While my answer will be as sincere and truthful as I can make it I am also going to make my responses entertaining and post them up for others to read. So if you don't want others to know its you, tell me or sign it with some clever name.



Let's give it a shot and see if its entertaining or not!If I really like the question I may even do it on a video!
Reply
Old Feb 22, 2012 | 01:22 PM
  #2  
majik's Avatar
Administrator
 
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 13,943
Likes: 0
From: ɯooɹpǝq ɹnoʎ
Vehicle: ǝdnoɔ sısǝuǝƃ
Default

I find this intriguing.

Let the games begin!



Got any examples to start the gears turning in people's heads?
Reply
Old Feb 27, 2012 | 01:52 PM
  #3  
HellBilly's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Your mom's house...
Vehicle: 2013 Genesis Coupe
Default

Example:



"Dear HellBilly,



My boyfriend always talks about how awesome his Honda Civic is, and is always doing projects on his car instead of making sweet love to me. I really need the cock, but he would rather f*ck the tailpipe of his piece of sh*t Civic that is held together by ductape and zip ties. What should I do?



Signed,



Anonymous"



"Dear Anonymous,



Your boyfriend is a fag, him and all of the other Honda owners. One you never put your car before pussy... period. I am a rabid fanatic of my car, but anything can wait if I am getting putang. Nothing in life is that important that you put aside getting pussy, unless you are gay. Which as I said is the case for all Honda drivers. Dump your man, and give me a call, I will fulfill all of your cock hungry needs.



HellBilly"
Reply
Old Feb 28, 2012 | 04:56 PM
  #4  
pnutkitten's Avatar
Moderator
 
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 615
Likes: 0
From: PacNW
Vehicle: 2013 BMW 128i
Default

Originally Posted by HellBilly
Example:



"Dear HellBilly,



My boyfriend always talks about how awesome his Honda Civic is, and is always doing projects on his car instead of making sweet love to me. I really need the cock, but he would rather f*ck the tailpipe of his piece of sh*t Civic that is held together by ductape and zip ties. What should I do?



Signed,



Anonymous"



"Dear Anonymous,



Your boyfriend is a fag, him and all of the other Honda owners. One you never put your car before pussy... period. I am a rabid fanatic of my car, but anything can wait if I am getting putang. Nothing in life is that important that you put aside getting pussy, unless you are gay. Which as I said is the case for all Honda drivers. Dump your man, and give me a call, I will fulfill all of your cock hungry needs.



HellBilly"


I was drinking cocoa... and this made it come out my nose. Thanks HellBilly! <3
Reply
Old Mar 12, 2012 | 12:58 PM
  #5  
HellBilly's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Your mom's house...
Vehicle: 2013 Genesis Coupe
Default

Dear Hell Billy,



A Hyundai vendor recently took money from a forum member as an advancement for a tuning event. Later, I was unable to get my tune and told that one was not available for my vehicle. The vendor never refunded my money and I never received any tune for my Hyundai. What should I do?



-slow.0




Dear Slow.0,



I suggest either finding out where said vendor parks his car and pissing in his/her's gas tank. In fact I suggest squatting on their hood and leaving them a present there too. Then cut the stems on their wheels thereby releasing all air out of their tires and making them requiring repair.



Oh, and f*ck JAY@SFR!!!



Sincerely,



HellBilly
Reply
Old Mar 27, 2012 | 01:38 PM
  #6  
pnutkitten's Avatar
Moderator
 
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 615
Likes: 0
From: PacNW
Vehicle: 2013 BMW 128i
Default

Dear HellBilly,





You are kind of AMAZING. The end.





Love,



Kitten
Reply
Old Mar 27, 2012 | 03:11 PM
  #7  
HellBilly's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Your mom's house...
Vehicle: 2013 Genesis Coupe
Default

Originally Posted by pnutkitten
Dear HellBilly,





You are kind of AMAZING. The end.





Love,



Kitten


Reply
Old Mar 28, 2012 | 04:49 PM
  #8  
pnutkitten's Avatar
Moderator
 
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 615
Likes: 0
From: PacNW
Vehicle: 2013 BMW 128i
Default

Originally Posted by HellBilly


Reply
Old Apr 1, 2012 | 10:02 PM
  #9  
HellBilly's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Your mom's house...
Vehicle: 2013 Genesis Coupe
Default

Originally Posted by pnutkitten


I am only amazing with the right person.
Reply
Old Apr 1, 2012 | 11:18 PM
  #10  
i8acobra's Avatar
Super Moderator
 
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 5,735
Likes: 3
From: Vegas, Baby, Vegas!!!
Vehicle: '14 Ford F-150
Default

Starting to look like a Twilight movie in here... fags.



Reply


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:58 AM.