This is an 18+ section that may contain language, images, and video not suitable for work, marriages, children, or anyone opposed to graphic content. Dwarfs
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Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 259
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Vehicle: 1997/Hyundia/Tiburon Fx
Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and take
themto their separate hotel rooms.
The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His depression
is made worse by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his little
friend shouting out cries of "Here I come again. ONE,TWO,THREE UUH!"
all night long. In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first,
"How did it go?" The first mutters, "It was so embarrassing.
I simply couldn't get an erection."
The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing?
I couldn't even get on the bed."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A guy checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely,
so he thought he'd get one of those girls from the escort services you see
advertised in phone book yellow pages. He came across an ad for a girl
calling herself Erogenique, a lovely girl, bending over in the
photo.
She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair,
long graceful legs all the way up to her (ooops). You know the kind.
So he figures, what the hell, he'll give her a call.
"Hello," the woman says softly.
God, she sounded sexy. "Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like
you to come to my room and give me one.
No, wait, I should be straight with you.
I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex.
I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it.
Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.
We'll go hot and heavy all night; Tie me up, wear leather and strap me,
cover me in chocolate syrup and whip cream, anything you want baby.
Now, how does that sound?"
She says, "That sounds fantastic, but for an outside line you need to press 9.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A BOSS WALKED INTO THE OFFICE ONE MORNING NOT KNOWING THAT HIS ZIPPER
WAS DOWN AND HIS FLY AREA IS WIDE OPEN
HIS SECRETARY WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID "BOSS THIS MORNING WHEN YOU LEFT YOUR HOUSE, DID YOU CLOSE YOUR GARAGE DOOR?"
THIS WAS NOT A PHRASE THAT HER BOSS UNDERSTOOD, SO HE WENT INTO HIS
OFFICE LOOKING A BIT PUZZLED
WHEN HE WAS ABOUT DONE WITH HIS PAPERWORK HE SUDDENLY NOTICED THAT HIS ZIPPER WAS NOT ZIPPED UP
HE ZIPPED UP AND REMEMBERING WHAT HIS SECRETARY HAS TOLD HIM, FINALLY
UNDERSTOOD THEN HE INTENTIONALLY WENT OUT TO ASK FOR A CUP OF COFFEE
FROM HIS SECRETARY.
WHEN HE REACHED HER DESK, HE SAID "WHEN YOU SAW THE GARAGE DOOR OPEN DID YOU SEE MY JAGUAR PARKED IN THERE?"
THE SECRETARY SMILED FOR A MOMENT AND SAID " "NO BOSS I DIDNT,, ALL I SAW WAS A MINI VAN WITH 2 FLAT TIRES"
themto their separate hotel rooms.
The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His depression
is made worse by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his little
friend shouting out cries of "Here I come again. ONE,TWO,THREE UUH!"
all night long. In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first,
"How did it go?" The first mutters, "It was so embarrassing.
I simply couldn't get an erection."
The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing?
I couldn't even get on the bed."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A guy checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely,
so he thought he'd get one of those girls from the escort services you see
advertised in phone book yellow pages. He came across an ad for a girl
calling herself Erogenique, a lovely girl, bending over in the
photo.
She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair,
long graceful legs all the way up to her (ooops). You know the kind.
So he figures, what the hell, he'll give her a call.
"Hello," the woman says softly.
God, she sounded sexy. "Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like
you to come to my room and give me one.
No, wait, I should be straight with you.
I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex.
I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it.
Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.
We'll go hot and heavy all night; Tie me up, wear leather and strap me,
cover me in chocolate syrup and whip cream, anything you want baby.
Now, how does that sound?"
She says, "That sounds fantastic, but for an outside line you need to press 9.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A BOSS WALKED INTO THE OFFICE ONE MORNING NOT KNOWING THAT HIS ZIPPER
WAS DOWN AND HIS FLY AREA IS WIDE OPEN
HIS SECRETARY WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID "BOSS THIS MORNING WHEN YOU LEFT YOUR HOUSE, DID YOU CLOSE YOUR GARAGE DOOR?"
THIS WAS NOT A PHRASE THAT HER BOSS UNDERSTOOD, SO HE WENT INTO HIS
OFFICE LOOKING A BIT PUZZLED
WHEN HE WAS ABOUT DONE WITH HIS PAPERWORK HE SUDDENLY NOTICED THAT HIS ZIPPER WAS NOT ZIPPED UP
HE ZIPPED UP AND REMEMBERING WHAT HIS SECRETARY HAS TOLD HIM, FINALLY
UNDERSTOOD THEN HE INTENTIONALLY WENT OUT TO ASK FOR A CUP OF COFFEE
FROM HIS SECRETARY.
WHEN HE REACHED HER DESK, HE SAID "WHEN YOU SAW THE GARAGE DOOR OPEN DID YOU SEE MY JAGUAR PARKED IN THERE?"
THE SECRETARY SMILED FOR A MOMENT AND SAID " "NO BOSS I DIDNT,, ALL I SAW WAS A MINI VAN WITH 2 FLAT TIRES"
Senior Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,654
Likes: 0
From: Albertville Insane Asylum
Vehicle: 1999/Hyundai/Tiburon
QUOTE (1ucb4u @ Mar 31 2006, 02:26 PM)
OK 2 gay dudes on the beach going at it A astroid hits what 1 dies first???
The Bottom 1 his shit's already packed!!! lmao.gif
The Bottom 1 his shit's already packed!!! lmao.gif
lmao.gif I DON'T GET IT lmao.gif
